Hey, it’s Black Friday! What the heck are you doing reading this blog post instead of frantically searching the store for that huge discount on a television that’s too big for your living room? Step back from the computer and race to the store. Now!Unless you’re already in the store and you’re reading this on your phone as you wait in a line that extends the length of the store and then across the back aisle and halfway to the front again. In that case, check out some of my other posts.Whatever the case, I hope you’re enjoying your Black Friday. If you’re looking for a deal, I hope you find one. I’m just looking for a low-key day at home, and I’ve found it, so I’m happy.In thinking about Black Friday I realized that part of the appeal it holds for people is just the adventure and tradition of it. That’s probably even better than the deals for some people.But for the other Black Friday Buzz Kills like me, I’ve compiled a short list of other black things cooler than Black Friday.--Black chicken. I first saw this troubling animal on an episode of Chopped. It’s exactly what it sounds like. If I hadn’t seen professional chefs cooking with it, I would have thought it was a diseased chicken just by looking at it. I was wrong though. It’s not diseased.In fact, black chickens are among the most laid-back of all poultry. That’s great for them if a kid’s looking for a pet, because the black chicken is a good choice. It’s bad for them if someone’s looking for an easy animal to capture and eat though, because they’re a good choice for that, too.Sorry black chicken.--Blaxploitation films. Okay, so the word black isn’t actually in this entry, but that’s just because someone got all cutesy with the name back in the seventies. I don’t think there’s any other film genre—noir, maybe—whose designation automatically makes me think “cool” when I hear it mentioned.Shaft, Blacula, Blackenstein, The Black Godfather, Foxy Brown and Dolemite. My goodness, I think I’ve become cooler just by typing the titles of those films. Hang on while I update my IMDB watchlist…--Chicago Black Sox. Any time some smug White Sox fan likes to rub it in that the Cubs haven’t won the World Series since 1908, while the White Sox just won the World Series in 2005, I like to bring up the Black Sox, who intentionally lost the World Series in 1919.Because nothing masks the desperation many Cubs fans feel better than bringing up the exploits of a team from 95 years ago.--The Man in Black, Johnny Cash. If Blaxploitation films don’t make me feel cool enough, Johnny Cash picks up the slack. As if his own songs from the fifties, sixties and seventies weren’t badass enough, he finished his career doing covers of songs like "I Won’t Back Down", "Hurt", "I Hung my Head", and "In My Life" in such rich, unique ways that I like some of them better than the original way they were done.--Black lights. I’ve never had a black light. Probably because I don’t smoke pot or drop acid. But they’ve always seemed cool to me. They do give me a headache if I think about them too long though. I mean black light. How can something black have light? That’s an oxymoron. Best not to think about it too much, I guess.--Black skies. This is a little bit odd, because anywhere that there are really black skies—meaning dark skies—the skies aren’t black, but rather filled with thousands of stars.I go to a particular country road between two fields in rural Indiana to watch meteor showers a couple of times per year. There’s no light pollution, and if there are no clouds, the sky is amazing. The first time I went out there I was by myself and I parked on a deserted road, got out of my car, looked up at the sky, and for a brief moment actually felt a little bit afraid because of all of the stars. It was like I was in space all by myself.Weird, I know, but find yourself some dark skies and you’ll know what I’m talking about.So Happy Black Friday to you. And just a reminder, only 27 days until Christmas.PREVIOUS POST: These Things Happened on ThanksgivingIF YOU LIKED THIS POST I BET YOU'LL ALSO LIKE: Target Black Friday On Thanksgiving is Soul Crushing and Stupid+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++Hey, did you like reading this? If so, you should Share it on Facebook so you can bring joy to others. You can also find tons of other posts by me here. And you can like my Facebook page, Brett Baker Writes. Please.
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