In ninth grade I took a class called American Studies. From what I remember it was sort of a mish mash of other subjects, but all focused on America. So history, government, health, sociology, a bit of pop culture. Pretty much anything that related to America and being American.The teacher for the class was Mrs. Ruzbasan. I don’t remember much about her. I think she was friendly. Maybe a bit aloof. And I remember next-to-nothing about the class.However, one thing I do remember was a comment so at odds with what I’d always heard from adults that it really stuck with me. (Obviously. This declaration took place twenty-four years ago, and I still remember it.)I don’t remember what we were talking about. Something related to teenage difficulties. And no one in the class was saying much. She was looking for answers, but we weren’t giving them. And then she went into this little monologue about how she understood how difficult it was to be a kid.What?How difficult it was to be a kid? A grownup is saying this? How can that be?When I was a kid all I ever heard was how great we kids had it. No responsibilities, no bills, our parents took care of us. Typical adult stuff. The sort of stuff that made me wonder whether adults remembered the challenges of being a kid.But here was this lady, this adult, standing in front of a room of twenty-five teenagers, talking about kid problems. She mentioned how we’re not taken seriously, and we don’t have as many freedoms, and we have to listen to what other people tell us to do.It was like listening to another kid. She was saying the sort of things my friends and I always said.And then she said, “I wouldn’t want to be a kid again. Being an adult is much better.”I swear the entire class gasped in disbelief. Okay, maybe not, but we didn’t expect an adult to say such a thing. Finally, someone admitted what we’d claimed for years: that compared to kids, adults have it made.“I can drive a car. I can stay up late. I have my own money to spend. And I know what’s important. I’m much happier as an adult than I was as a kid.”I’m pretty sure the entire class felt vindicated. It was like the guy that everyone thinks is such a good guy, but you think he’s an asshole, and then he does something to reveal to everyone that he really is an asshole. And you just want to stand up and yell, “I knew I was right! I told you so!”So with that knowledge the urgency to become an adult only increased. I’d made it through fourteen years of being a kid, by law I only had four more years until I became an adult, so if I could just hold on for a few more years, things would start looking up.I’d get my license, get a job, earn some money, graduate high school, go to college, start a career, earn more money, start a family. I’d be an adult all the time and I’d never reminisce about how great it is to be a kid.And then a funny thing happened.I became an adult. And all of those things happened. But there were still times that I didn’t feel like an adult. I wondered if I’d changed at all from when I was that fourteen-year-old kid.I’m thirty-eight now and there are still times that I think to myself, “Am I adult enough to handle this?” When my youngest daughter was a few months old I remember being home in the evening with her, and my four- and six-year-old sons, feeding them dinner, brushing teeth, tucking them in, and marveling that I was the one charge.The fact of the matter is that no matter how I feel sometimes, I have changed in the past twenty-four years. I have become an adult. I don’t know when it happened. I suppose like everything else in life it was gradual.But I’ve grown. Both in years, and in maturity. I’m an adult. I know that things are usually never as good or as bad as they seem. I know what’s important. I know we should enjoy every sandwich. I know people will disappoint you. I know people will surprise you. I know your friend today, can be your enemy tomorrow.And I know whether you’re a kid, or you’re an adult, you better try to enjoy it, because it’s all temporary.This post was written as part of ChicagoNow's monthly writing exercise in which the ChicagoNow community is given a topic and then challenged to produce a post on that topic in one hour. Tonight's topic: "Write about the first time you felt like you were a grown-up."Type your email address in the box and click the "create subscription" button to receive an e-mail each time I write a new post! Guaranteed spam-free, unsubscribe any time.
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